I’ve mentioned it a couple of times on a few previous blog posts, but I am within the first month of a brand new job. Praise hands and all that jazz, but it took me a long time to get to the point where I was finally comfortable with trying to make myself happy.
I’ve also mentioned a few times that I work in the transportation/logistics industry, and if you haven’t worked in it or aren’t close to someone who does, it is an incredibly stressful industry. Think about it – trucks don’t stop at nights or on holidays. Those trucks have drivers behind the wheel that need direction, money to take home to their families, or just a little bit of human contact every now and then. Some drivers are literally on the road for three weeks straight without seeing home. That’s crazy! And truly a job for someone who loves driving (hence the HUGE driver shortage in this industry now, but that’s another story). So, then think about the people who manage these drivers, and then manage the customers as well as a team of employees. And there you have my job.
I will never say a bad word about the company I left. Leaving there was the hardest decision I’ve had to make. That company gave me so much experience in this industry. They were the most flexible company I’d ever worked for – I worked from home for a month after my maternity leave was up. They never questioned doctor’s appointments or time off. They promoted me to a manager position that a female had never had before. So then, Laura, what’s the problem? It sounds great!
I was working so much. I was working well into the night, most weekends, and when I brought my laptop out and my kid said “you’re working again, mommy?” – it straight up broke my heart. I knew something had to change. I couldn’t miss this time with my child. And my husband. And doing things I love. Fortunately – I had had a company reach out to me before ( I had previously turned them down), and lo and behold, they still really wanted me to work for them.
Once I had the job offer and accepted (and knew I couldn’t back down due to doing it the last time), it got real. I was going away from something that I knew inside and out. Where I knew everyone – where I was comfortable. I had to get out my comfort zone in order to finally be happy. To finally have some time back to spend with my kid and husband. And not just time, but time that even if I was spending with my family, I wouldn’t be stressing over work.
After two weeks, I know I made the right decision. For starters, the company is located right in the middle of downtown in the midst of all the food and fun – and while it’s learning a completely new system and part of the industry, I know it was the right move. I’m a block away from B, and five from Sheffield. I’m learning the system quickly, and getting to learn my new normal. B even made mention that it was so nice to have me home during the week and not be so stressed out all the time. And I know if he can tell it, then Sheffield can, too.
My biggest enemy in my happiness was myself. I was so afraid of getting out of what I knew and what I was comfortable with that I was literally sacrificing my sanity and family. And as I’ve grown older, I’ve learned that it’s just not worth it. It’s not. I tell myself multiple times a day – it’s just trucks, it’s just trucks. Well it’s just your happiness – what’s it worth to you?