Reminder

This year has been fucking ridiculous, right?  I know that the ridiculousness doesn’t end at the stroke of midnight on December 31st – and sometimes that can be overwhelming.

With the extreme rise in Covid cases, I hold my breath every day – waiting for our school to become 100% remote and thus causing me to be 100% work from home.  I don’t know about you, but all of that causes my heart rate to increase and all of those worst-case scenarios to come to the forefront of my mind.

BUT this weekend, I got a gentle reminder from a good friend.  She is running a virtual half marathon for St. Jude, and I donated to her team.  She wrote me back a thank you email and it said, “Miss your face and your amazing positivity.”  And what honestly went through my mind was, positivity?  What positivity?

And so I thought back to when she knew me best – she was my boss when I worked at a previous company.  And you know something?  I did start every day there with a much better attitude than I have now.  Granted, I am in a very different place than I was when I was there – I have a kid, a much more demanding job and different responsibilities.  But even with all of that – why can I not choose to start the day with a much more positive attitude?  I do the best I can at my job, I’m the best mom I know how to be – I need to stop beating myself up over every thing and that especially includes anything that I can’t control.

I’m going to make it a point to try to start the day with a different mindset – I will do what I can at my job, I will not let it eat me alive and drag me down into that dark hole.  Changing my mindset will be something that is fresh and on my mind while we try to make it through this last month a half of the most garbage year ever!